Thinking Errors: Stop Your Kids From Making Excuses
Almost all parents feel the same thing – arguing with their kids is a losing battle. It can be so amazing that no matter what you tell your child, he will always have that smart comeback that is often very effective at pushing your buttons or leaving you speechless. And no matter how mature you try to be and what reasoning you put on, the moment your child gets angry, he is never at fault.
It has remained a real wonder how children manage to come up with this witty comebacks. But one thing is certain – children have several “traps” for you to fall into. That is why it is important to know these traps in order for you to avoid them. When you realize what these traps are, you will be able to hold your child accountable for his actions.
It is a natural thing to see our kids blame others and point their fingers at other people when we hold them responsible for their behavior. Usually, kids think they are the victims despite the gravity of their mistakes. Seeing themselves as the victim makes them feel, in their mind, that they can get away with anything.
If you noticed that your child has built the habit of blaming others whenever you try to correct his actions, then you need to challenge the way he thinks. If you try to correct his behavior and he makes a scene and tries to win you over, find ways to break this bad habit right away.
Children should not be tolerated when they blame other people or external factors for failing to perform. When your child tries to blame someone or something else for not completing a task, he is actually telling you that it is not his fault and he is the victim.
“My dog ate my homework” is a classic example, and is also a very powerful trap. It means, “I am a victim of my dog, so it’s not my fault I don’t have my homework”.
Children who are tolerated to believe that they are the victim grow up ill-equipped for accomplishing certain milestones that are necessary for a successful early life development. When your son tells you it was his classmate’s fault, tell him “Blaming Peter will not solve anything. You need to apologize to him after class or I will tell your father.”
The earlier you break your child’s habit of blaming others and dodging responsibility, the better. You have to know what these thinking errors are so that you can hold your kids accountable for their behavior. You have to understand how these thinking errors work so you can avoid falling into your children’s traps and put a stop to their blaming, excuse-making, and victim-thinking habits.
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